Legal Humour Corner

A 35 year old gentleman living in Germany has had a headache for 5 years.  He recalls being drunk and getting a whack to the head on New Year’s eve in 2005 and he has had headaches ever since but has not consulted a doctor until recently.  This week he had surgery to remove a bullet from his skull.  Nobody is sure exactly how that happened but it is presumed that partying revellers were the cause.  This case certainly adds a new dimension to the expression, “it’s all in your head.”  This story has put the fear of the Lord...

The past few days belong to Steven Slater, the frustrated airline attendant who after getting hit on the head by a piece of luggage, gracefully left his job of 20 years at Kennedy Airport by getting on the PA to chew out a customer, grabbing a can of beer and sliding out of the plane’s emergency chute.  He has been charged with a number of offences.  I’m sure many of us side with Slater as is apparent from the massive expressions of support on Facebook etc.I wonder whether any of our colleagues will be next in expressing their frustration in...

On July 12th, Laguna Niguel, California, saw the 32nd annual Mooning Amtrak event.  About 8000 folks from all over gathered to partake. They apparently line up against a chain link fence next to the railway tracks and every time an Amtrak train passes by, they pull down their pants or lift their skirts and shout “whooo”.  There are rules to follow however and the police are out in full force.  Nudity per se is prohibited and the participants must display their derrieres only in the direction of the passing train.  If they turn around and moon the other way, police...

Isn’t it all a matter of perspective? As I write these words there are demonstrations going on in Toronto as the G-20 is taking place. Hooligans have been rampaging through downtown, vandalizing and looting. They even torched four police cars. Meanwhile in Brantford, about 100 plus kilometres away, a 42 year old man who had been drinking earlier this week put a banana up the tailpipe of a police vehicle.  This certainly surprised the officer occupying the vehicle and he exited and arrested the man charging him with mischief. Not surprisingly the gentleman confessed to his deed.  I doubt that...

Bull or chicken? You decide. Christian Hernandez is a Mexican matador. He went into the bullfighting ring the other day to face a half ton bull. Suddenly he got cold feet, threw his red cape down and bolted out of the ring. This did not sit well with the organizers of the event and they had him arrested, for breach of contract. It comes as a complete surprise to me that breach of contract is one of these events that would call for police involvement. Did the victims of the breach of contract call 911?  I can just see this...

Under (the kilt) Justice has been done this past week in Raymond, Alberta. Right has prevailed. 19 year old student Hamish Jacobs insisted on wearing a kilt at his high school graduation ceremony. The school said no, as the rules required the gentlemen to wear pants.  After protests hit the school board from all over the world, the trustees relented and they allowed Hamish to forgo the pants and wear a kilt. I would guess that this week was not a busy one for the trustees and that they had nothing more important to discuss.  After the meeting was called,...

I shall be attending a practice management seminar shortly, called “Small law firm Expo”. The theme will be to improve efficiency in the law office. I wish there would be a workshop on how to not misplace your documents as I find I spend an inordinate amount of time looking for files and documents that seem to vanish in some Bermuda Triangle in my office. I believe there is actually a workshop called, “Running a paperless office.”  I do not know if that would help me any although some days I feel I am doing that already, albeit unintentionally. Speaking of Russia,...

Where were their eyes? A wrecking crew in Denton, Texas went out to demolish a house that had been ordered to get the wrecker’s ball due to the owner leaving it in a messy and unsafe state.  By mistake the wreckers knocked down the house across the street. This did not sit well with Mrs Francis Howard who had been living in the house for 47 years and who just returned from a trip to California.  You might think that the lady’s claim is a slam dunk.  I’m not so sure. I believe that if some of the companies I...

Caveat animals; humans around Should we really worry about those non-human animals that much?   In Rock Hill, South Carolina, two men had an argument at a local motel. One went over to the other, a Tony Smith, complaining that Smith was making to much noise. Smith then came after the victim and whacked him in the face with a live snake.  Police charged Smith with assault and battery.  My question is, what was the guy doing in a motel with a live snake?  I do know that next time I visit Rock Hill, South Carolina, if my motel neighbour makes...

Perhaps April Fools’ Day was a good day for the B.C. Human Rights Tribunal (B.C. H.R.T.) to be conducting the hearing in part of comedian Guy Earle, at the suit of complainant, Lesbian Lorna Pardy for allegedly offending her.  Apparently the complainant and her girlfriend were sitting front row centre heckling Earle at a Vancouver nightclub about three years ago. Things started getting uglier when Earle made some crude remarks about Lesbians whereupon the complainant threw a cup of water at the comedian whereupon the comedian yanked her sunglasses off braking them.  Pardy filed a discrimination complaint against Earle, and...